The purpose of this test is to certify academic knowledge and skills equivalent to those of a high school graduate.

 

Section I: Social Studies

 

1. Where are you?

a. I am in Somerville, Massachusetts

b. I am two months from my seventeenth birthday

c. I am a coin in the pocket of a misfit god

d. I am at the same desk as the stranger who scribbled Eminem into the wood grain:This world is mine for the taking. Make me king.

 

2. Why are you so lonely?

a. Late stage capitalism

b. I build bridges to other people just so I can burn them

c. When there is static on the radio I don’t turn the dial

d. Late stage capitalism

 

3. Which of the following are featured in Maslow’s “Hierarchy of Needs”?

a. A mother not crumbling at the edges

b. Wendy’s fries with that weird, slightly nasty cheese sauce

c. Eyeliner

d. Self-esteem

 

Section II: Science

 

1. Why was there no sky that night?

a. The stars had gone

b. 95% of the universe is dark matter, including you

c. An uninvited inside you can eclipse an entire galaxy

d. Eyes squeezed shut

 

2. What is Vicodin?

a. A Schedule II narcotic

b. A warm drip of peace that begins in the crown of the skull and washes slowly downward through the body

c. A white, oblong capsule of relief

d. The discovery that I am my father’s daughter

 

3. Identify the primary characteristics of a beloved, unconscious in the grass

a. A large, unexpected mass to trip over

b. The stench of a sour Tom Collins

c. The knot in your chest, tight the way he taught you when you were ten and securing the canoe

d. A beard that fades to nothing before the corner of the jaw where one would check for a pulse

 

Section III: Mathematical Reasoning

 

1. What is the Pythagorean Theorem?

a. A way to find what is missing

b. a² + b² = c²

c. The measurement of the climb ahead

d. Like everything, dependent on the right angle

 

2. What is the order of operations for attempting to resist invisibility?

a. Running on dry sand, the loon’s howl, car alarm, cabinets on fire

b. Cabinets on fire, running on dry sand, the loon’s howl, car alarm

c. The loon’s howl, cabinets on fire, car alarm, running on dry sand

d. Car alarm, running on dry sand, cabinets on fire, the loon’s howl

 

3. Using the formula: potential-setback(undiagnosed ADHD+depression), how long will it take an individual without a degree to achieve success?

a. 10 years

b. 30 years

c. As measured by the flickering of a streetlight, the time that fits in the space

between when the moon should have set and the sun should have risen

d. No solution: success undefined

 

Section IV: English Literacy

​

1. Which of the below are proper uses of a comma?

a. To say slow down

b. To say breathe

c. To list the ways they’re wrong about you

d. To say I’m not finished yet

 

2. Why did Robert Frost take “the one less traveled by”?

a. The point is: we make choices

b. The point is: we have to make choices

c. The point is: we get to make choices

d. The point is: we can move only forward

 

3. Do you understand that now you will never become a writer?

a. Of course

b. No

c. If a tree falls, etc.

d. Recently, I saw a video of a thirsty magpie. In it, the bird finds an open water

bottle left as litter in a park. Sticking her beak down into it, she can only sip so

much before the water is too low, beyond her reach. She goes out of frame and, before you can scroll past and forget her, returns with a stone small enough to carry in her beak. She drops it into the bottle, raising the water level, takes a drink. Seeks, carries, drops, drinks. Seeks, carries, drops, drinks. Seeks, carries, drops, drinks, drinks, drinks, flies.